The 12 days of a mom's Christmas

It's the most wonderful time of the year...or so they tell me. Christmas is my favorite season. I love the lights, sounds and smells of the holiday season. I feel people are nice and smile more than usual and this makes my heart happy. BUT Christmas also brings about its challenges for moms, who usually are the ones that make Christmas actually happen.

Here is my life during the holiday season. I am not complaining nor trying to martyr myself cause the good Lord knows I love it, but please just be a little kinder and gentler to moms this season because this is really what we go through!

On the 1st day of Christmas my husband said to me, "here's the card don't be so spending happy!"
On the 2nd day of Christmas I started shopping, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 3rd day of Christmas we got a Christmas tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 4th day of Christmas I swept up pine needles from the tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 5th day of Christmas I started watching TV, Christmas vacation and now a musical where Elf sings, I swept up pine needles from the tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 6th day of Christmas I did more shopping- more Frozen crap, Christmas vacation and now a musical where Elf sings, I swept up pine needles from the tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 7th day of Christmas I sent out Christmas cards, more Frozen crap, Christmas vacation and now a musical where Elf sings, I swept up pine needles from the tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 8th day of Christmas we put up Christmas lights, "I don't think we have enough," I sent out Christmas cards, more Frozen crap, Christmas vacation and now a musical where Elf sings, I swept up pine needles from the tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 9th day of Christmas I need to start planning the dinner, maybe just chili this year (Hey, it did win an award), we put up Christmas lights, "I don't think we have enough," I sent out Christmas cards, more Frozen crap, Christmas vacation and now a musical where Elf sings, I swept up pine needles from the tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 10th day of Christmas I started wrapping all the gifts, how did it cost so much?, I need to start planning the dinner, maybe just chili this year (Hey, it did win an award), we put up Christmas lights, "I don't think we have enough," I sent out Christmas cards, more Frozen crap, Christmas vacation and now a musical where Elf sings, I swept up pine needles from the tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 11th day of Christmas when's it going to be January? I started wrapping all the gifts, how did it cost so much?, I need to start planning the dinner, maybe just chili this year (Hey, it did win an award), we put up Christmas lights, "I don't think we have enough," I sent out Christmas cards, more Frozen crap, Christmas vacation and now a musical where Elf sings, I swept up pine needles from the tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happy!
On the 12th day of Christmas I relaxed..just kidding, I cleaned out my closet, when's it going to be January? I started wrapping all the gifts, how did it cost so much?, I need to start planning the dinner, maybe just chili this year (Hey, it did win an award), we put up Christmas lights, "I don't think we have enough," I sent out Christmas cards, more Frozen crap, Christmas vacation and now a musical where Elf sings, I swept up pine needles from the tree, 2 Frozen watches and don't be so spending happeeeeeeee!

Merry Christmas from the Wrights and in case you didn't' get a Christmas card this year, send me your address for crying out loud! What do you think, I just know where you all live! Geeeez!

* Our first attempt at our Christmas card picture*

This Moment

None of us truly lives for ourselves. You can't. Unless you are alone stranded on some island, most of the things you do each day is for other people. When you were growing up, you attended school because your parents made you. It was for them. Then when you went to college it was for your future self, still not for you at this moment in time. Now, who are you living for? Family, friends, co-workers, perhaps still your future self? None of us truly lives for ourselves. What I mean by this is that each moment that passes, each day that was spent thinking, worrying or focusing on something other than our own happiness is a day wasted. And how many days have we already wasted? Of course we can't be 'happy.' We are too busy dealing with so many other aspects of life. We work tirelessly to keep everyone around us warm and safe and happy that we forget we have to make sure we are living for ourselves too. But how do you do that in such a connected, over sensitized world with very little emphasis on each passing special moment?

I feel like each day of my life flies by and I have no idea what happened. All I can do is focus on what needs to get done the next day. And so many people will tell you, "Oh that is just having kids and a family." Maybe. But how do I break free from the cycle. That is what no one ever tells you. Even before we had kids, I was in this cycle. Get up, get ready, work, eat, bed. Now it's just a little harder doing this for 2 other people but it's still the same concept. So to make sure I am living, even if it's just for 5 minutes of the day, for myself then some changes need to be made. You can't walk around saying, " I wish things were different," but have no plan to change it.

Bye, Technology. And no, I can't throw my computer out the window, I need it so I can pay my bills! But I don't need all this crap on my phone that constantly shows me other people's life moments. I have no problem with Facebook and emails and instagram, etc and I will be the first to admit I am probably addicted. But that is was addiction does, it robs you of happiness. When you hear the word 'addiction' you probably think of alcoholics, drug addicts maybe over eaters. But all of us have addictions, some are just better at hiding them than others. When I am on my phone, I am missing my daughters discovering a new leaf, hugging, or simply just standing in the sunlight. When I am on my phone I am missing my husband walk in the door from work, arms wide open as his kids rush to his arms with excitement. I miss clever and witty things Mattie says and I miss that mischievous smile of Gigi's. All because I was on my phone. I need a phone to call people and for people to call me. Even if I have to go to Wal-Mart and sign up for a Jitterbug. And I heard a long time ago, before I was even born a man invented a camera that takes pretty good pictures. I am missing life, my life that I am trying to live for and it's my fault I am missing it. I can check Facebook and instagram later at night on a computer like we used to do way back in 2005. But time, THIS time is fleeting and I am missing so many moments.

I have to get off the couch. My name is Alison and I addicted to the couch. It's driving my husband nuts anyway. He got off the couch about 6 weeks ago and started running again. I say again because before we were married with kids, my husband and I ran together. We really enjoyed it. We had goals of 5Ks and 10Ks and I think we both did a 5K at some point but then we just stopped. I know how hard it is to just want to lay down and watch a good show and that is fine from time to time, but it has become my second job. Anything you can do for 5-6 hours straight is your second job. Plus my husband may leave me if I don't end this relationship. But I do love you couch, I promise it's not you, it's me.

Perspective- I need perspective. I don't know what the opposite of this word is. Let's call it un-perspective. I need to be able to handle disappointments and set backs a little better. I need to be able to dust myself off, say "Oh well that sucked," and move on. I can't do this. I am addicted to un-perspective. I need to dwell on things that went wrong. I need to focus on those things for days. I need those unhappy events to linger in my mind constantly robbing my present moments of happiness. Sounds crazy, right? Yes it is but I honestly don't' know any other way except to be more aware of this when it happens and make a conscious effort to move on. Maybe this is just a woman thing. I hope so, otherwise I seriously might be crazy.

I may try eating more salads. I'm not going to take this one too serious. It's just a suggestion for now. I live in the south, so salads around here are only served with biscuits and gray.

I know this may sounds like a New Years resolution and maybe it is in some ways, but why wait until New Years to try and change your life today? I want to be in each moment more. I want to look back at my life and actually remember events and details, not Kim and Kanyes break-up (cause you do know that is coming, right?). I think it's really difficult to live in this world today and try to focus on your life and happiness with so many distractions that have been incorporated. But if I could choose this life or being stranded on an island alone where all I had to do was focus on my self and happiness, I would choose this life any day. Besides, I doubt they have couches on an island.

Instruct those who are rich in this present world not to be conceited or to fix their hope on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly supplies us with all things to enjoy.

Alison v.s. Play room

I did it! I finally did it! I got rid of my children's play room! I have taken back MY space and created a dining room which is what this room was meant for anyway. Do you want to know why I have a play room anyway? It's not so my kids can have a room in which to throw toys and explore. It's because one time a long time ago when Mattie was little I saw a commercial. It was a mom that had converted a room of her house into a play room for her toddler. "It's a place just for him," she said. "A place he can have for HIS stuff only." She looked really pretty with make up and perfect hair. She was smiling as her and her son played with cars on the pristine carpet and her son smiled and laughed and hugged his mom. "thanks mom," I heard him say, "for making me feel special."

I wanted to be that mom! I want that for my kids! My kids deserve a place of their own! So, one year ago we moved and bought a house with a dining room and I had no dining room furniture. Finally it was my turn to be THAT mom. I bought shelving and cute baskets. I hung artwork and created a reading area. This was going to be the place my kids could come to and have their own space. I am a good mom.

NOT! Nope! That didn't happen!

Here is what really happened....

They destroyed that room! They threw toys everywhere! They drilled play-doh into my carpet! They peed on the floor! They drew on the walls! It went from a special place for my kids to a place of stress for me! I hated the play room!

Luckily the play room has 2 doors which can close and then everything I hate about it is invisible. But sometimes someone would open one of the doors and I would again be reminded of the mess to clean up. Of course, my kids should clean this up. I would tell them often, sometimes everyday, "Please go clean the play room." This would ensue a series of whining and excuses such as belly aches, head aches, broken elbows. "Fine," I would say. "I will just do it." Sometimes my mother in law would come to visit and she would immediately go in there and clean. She has years of experience and I doubt the same feeling of hatred for the room that grew in me each time I laid eyes on it.

Weeks would pass and this room would get more out of control. Christmas and birthdays brought on added stress and 'stuff.' Toys were now being thrown in places they didn't belong. Parts to games were missing. Barbies were naked and no clothes were to be found. I would get to my breaking point then set aside a Saturday to just go in and organize. Games were back together, blocks were back in their containers and Barbies once again wore designer clothes only I would be so lucky as to ever own. Peace. Harmony. Tranquility. I am a good mom. .

Attack of the 2 and 4 year old. What took me 6 hours to complete took them 6 seconds to destroy. Why do I do this to myself I would wonder. Then my mind would go back to the woman in the commercial. I bet she doesn't complain and whine about the play room. I bet she cheeringly cleans it up for her son. After all, HIS space is all too important to take away. So out came the carper cleaner. After a few tries, play-doh really isn't that difficult to get out. Drawings on the wall can be taken away with a quick trip to Bi-lo for some magic erasers. Load up the kids and promise them candy if they are good. Besides I only need 1 item, how long could that take? 35 minutes later.....

The playroom is once again clean. Peace. Harmony. Tranquility. I am a good mom.

Destroyed.

This relationship lasted a full year. One year of my life! Some days I couldn't do anything until I cleaned it. I began to not care if Barbie had clothes or if all the pieces to Memory were there. If some of the cards are missing, then the game will take longer and maybe I will get a longer break! I began talking myself into keeping it more often. They need it, it's a good idea.

Destroyed.

DONE! I am DONE! This play room is a big cause of my stress! It drives me nuts! I hate it! There I said it, I HATE IT! I don't care if they have their own space, they are 2 and 4 and this is MY house! I went to college for 7 years, yes 7! And no, I am not a doctor. I paid for this house, I earned this house! I love this house, and I HATE this room!

Disassemble. Boxes. Donations. Trash bags. MY room!

Peace. Harmony. Tranquility. I am a good mom.

Pay no attention to the monkey game on the floor!