Life is hard. And busy. And sometimes mundane. I have always heard people say that once you have children your life will pass you by. This is true. Each day runs into the next. You muddle, you laugh when you can and you pray Friday will get here quickly. You love your family and your husband. Your kids drive you crazy but you can't imagine life without them and they are the best part of your best self. You keep up with people on Facebook or Instagram. You consider them friends because as adults how much time do we really have to spend with anyone? So you make excuses. You tell yourself things like, "I can't drive 2 hours to meet you for dinner, I am a mom now." OR " Yes, we should get together, let's do that soon." The last one you say just to be left alone. You nor the person you are speaking to have any intention of following up on that plan. We all do this. And it's awful. It's wrong. And our time with those we love and never see passes each day and we don't do anything about it. We need our friends NOW more than ever.
I have awesome friends. I do not take this for granted. I have friends that allow me to do really stupid stuff then forgive me and move on. I have friends that watch me do really stupid stuff and laugh with me. I have friends that will be my friends forever. This is a relationship that I do not take likely. It's one of the most important relationships you will have in your adult life. Your friends know you unlike anyone else. Call your friends. Don't just like their status on Facebook. Make plans. Show up. Be there. Laugh. Relax. Be you.
We all need that comfort zone where we can say what we need and have someone who listens, understands and explains what you should do next. When we have the toddler meltdown and we think we are the only moms that this has ever happened to, our friends can say, "Yeah, been there." When we have that situation at work with the weird lady that obviously hates everyone including you, we can tell our friends all about it. We laugh, we make fun of you and by the end you think, "Screw that lady at work, I have awesome friends!" It's a de stressor to have a close relationship with your friends, to get away and get your head straight. To make everything right with the world again. You can tell them any and everything. They relate, they advise, then they tell you how stupid you are being and that you need to get it together. Next, they will pour their selves the last glass of wine when no one is looking.
THEY ARE GREAT PEOPLE.
It's hard to be a mom and a wife and an employee. You feel pulled in so many different directions and its easy to lose your footing. We all need those people to stand us back up again and tell us "Hey I like you, you're awesome!" I feel this way each time I drive away from my spending time with my friends. We all met in one city but have since scattered which makes getting together more difficult, but we just never give up. We don't have the fake "yeah, I will call you, we should get together." We say this then 24 hours later you get invited to a random event on Facebook that involves everyone you love. You quickly grab a calendar then count the days. You remind each other every week how long it will be until you see each other again. Its a connection and bond like no other...
and its one of the most important and underrated aspects of adult hood.
Finding someone that gets you and loves you anyway is like finding that cashew in the mixed nuts jar. You are so excited you found it that you devour it while savoring each moment. Because there are always plenty of peanuts in the jar, but Cashews are rare.
