saying goodbye

Over the past few weeks I have had close ties to people that are going through extreme grief. Those that have lost loved ones and just don't know what to do next. They question God and faith and what this all means and all I can do is make them laugh and try to act like everything is normal. I don't do well in these types of situations. I say stupid things and make funny jokes and very possibly make them feel worse. I'm just tying to help. All I know is that you never get over it, you just find a new normal.

What I do know for sure is this: I feel better when I have a really good friendship with Jesus. When I rely on Him and talk to Him and believe that He is truly the one and only. I feel that and no one can talk me out of it. I also feel alone and desperate and left behind when I am out of step with this connection. I have many times through out my life left Him and tried to do it on my own. I have been angry with Him and I have had times when I didn't understand why He took people away from me that I loved. I need them more than Him and this made me mad. So, I get that about grief.

And maybe that is why I get it. Because I have been there and cried and felt grief and loss and hopelessness and came out with the same spirit to shine and love others just because I feel that is what Jesus wants; for us to be like Him and love others and be supportive and be kind. That is being a good person. I will always feel sad about people that leave my life and I will always feel empathy for those that lose a loved one. I really think the key is to treat them as you always have. Make them feel loved and special and like your best friend because that is what they are, really, and the last thing any of us wants is to feel weird or different around people we love.

So here is to you, my friend. To those of you that have felt grief and suffered and felt lost. I am here for you, but I will probably say something weird in the process. I don't mean anything by it, I am just trying to love you.

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